Google-y Eyes

If you’re wearing a smudge on your forehead today, then best respects. I thought about a celebratory Mardi Gras outing last night, but after the snow all day long, frankly I forgot that there was a tropical holiday going on. Besides, this gym-deprived season I’m Gras every Di … so why make a point of it? If we had the Naked Girls thing going on up here I’d feel different, I’m sure, but that tends not to be a feature hereabouts. Or maybe I just hang out in the wrong places.

Maybe you knew this, by the way, but After the Snow by Modern English is a drug song. Post-cocaine, to be specific. I’m pretty innocent when it comes to drugs and drug references, but this both startled me and seemed pretty obvious, once they blurted it out. And, you know, I don’t want to ruin your day or anything, but I think that Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds tune might, well, let’s just leave it at that.

Inevitable Blog Content Dep’t: These four months into Peppering, our search logs are turning fun. All month long we’ve been the #1 search result on MSN for “whale tail thong,” which is pretty amazing given that I’ve only ever mentioned it once. I guess MSN doesn’t get out much. We’re fourth on Google for “do not name your children,” making us accidental proponents of a world in which everyone presumably yells “hey you” a lot.

In one nice bit of Internet irony, we’re the second Google listing for Blind Cavefish, while the blog at blindcavefish.com comes in at #8. The three people who got to Pepper of the Earth in February Googling for “Hoboken leather factory” were probably disappointed in any number of ways, as was the one who came through looking for “Starbucks in the southern hemisphere.” Last time I looked the southern hemisphere was a pretty big place.

Sadly enough, the pickings are slim for the hopeful soul who wanted “female jello wrestling” and “nyc” - though it is the sort of thing we try to attend. Hint: you get better results if you leave out the quotation marks. We’re #1 on Google for “Booker T & the M.G.’.S Song Cords,” for all you Quadrophenic bondage kinksters; when you’re done with the Green Onions, I guess you can Tie a Yellow Ribbon around your partner (warning: annoying MIDI sound on link).

We’re a pretty good place to find Renée Fladen, who is the Renée of Walk Away Renée (#6 on Google). In the “It’s a Big World” category, we’ve had search hits on “chinese beer labels dali” (anyone? Bueller?), “solar flares” menstruation (if it gets that bad, run away!) and, curiously, “jorma kaukonen forehead.” But there is room for improvement. We are only the #2 place on the Internet, according to Google, to satisfy your “russell crowe spanked” itch. It’s nice to know we have room to grow.